Ever since I started to go through my divorce, I've had a few friends and family members (don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for them) who are turning into Hawk-Eyed Food Nazis with me. Every day I get asked by several people "You're still eating, aren't you?" or "You didn't purge today did you?" Believe me, I'll let you know if it happens. I'm trying to keep myself accountable. On the other hand, I have friends and family members who watch me eat and say "That's a lot of food." Well, make up your minds. Either I'm not eating or eating too much. I work out a lot and am very active all day, so, I need the calories. I'm also trying to get over a plateau right now, so, I'm upping my calories. Yeah, I've noticed that I'm really bloated, but, that's because I have IBS and I'm stressed, so, I'm gonna look pregnant by the middle of the day. Saying something like "Last time I saw you, you had a six pack, and now you're looking bloated." Thank you. I'm fully aware that I don't look all that great right now. "You know you need to eating certain percentages of fats, proteins, and carbs, so, why don't you do that? You'd probably look better." Well, because I can't count calories. I can only ballpark it. If I do count, I'll get obsessive and probably get overwhelmed and stop eating. So, you choose: either I eat and get horribly bloated, or, I don't eat for several days, binge, and then purge. It's up to you. If you want me to eat, stop the insensitive comments, please. I'm having a hard enough time as it is. It would be extremely refreshing to hear someone say "Wow. You look good today." Why can't someone just do that and leave me the hell alone? Even if you don't even mean it, it would still be nice to hear.
I'm fully aware of how fucked up this makes me sound...
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